“Feelin’ myself, I’m feelin’ myself, I’m feelin’ my
Feelin’ myself, I’m feelin’ myself, I’m feelin’ my, feelin’ my…”

 This catchy hook from a popular song a few years ago has been playing in my head for the last week or two. Its sassiness, bravado, and rhythm are in sync with how I’ve been feeling. We all know the last 18 months have been…interesting, and in times like these, we don’t always feel like ourselves. Stress, anxiety, anger, fear, frustration, and a host of other emotions can keep us from feeling like our best and most authentic selves.

When I went on hiatus, I wanted to relax, refresh, and hopefully kick-start my creativity and energy for what felt like a new season approaching. Little did I know how it would all unfold. I was excited about taking a real vacation for the first time in ages and was focused on that and praying that the pandemic wouldn’t upend my long-awaited plans. The break was one for the memory books, and I was left floating in renewal when it was over. Then tragedy struck.

How could I be feeling so awesome one moment and so devastated the next and the next and the next? The lows were emotionally debilitating, and recovery seemed far away. I leaned heavily into my faith, searching for answers and clues. Nothing was clear. But like a cloud-spotted sky, sunlight peeked through in unexpected ways and at the most unexpected times. Loss, pain, and devastation opened the door to nurturing, connection, recovery, and healing. Who knew?

Why am I sharing this with you today?  There are two reasons. First, I hope that it will encourage you to look up and be hopeful in moments of tragedy, loss, or devastation. Rays of sunlight peek through at the oddest points to penetrate our layers that most need warmth and energy. We have to shed unnecessary layers in preparation for what’s to come. When those layers are gone, we feel like ourselves again.

Secondly, today is a special day. I am grateful today to celebrate another trip around the sun. With all that we’ve experienced recently, I’m thankful to be here to share my gifts and purpose with you. Our challenges don’t define us. They help to clear the way that leads to better and more. A new season has begun both literally and figuratively. So today, with fewer layers to carry and a few more days marked on the calendar, I walk into a beautiful new season, and I’m feelin’ myself!

In late 2019, #prepandemic, I was on the subway in New York City when several young men boarded and began to perform amazing feats using only their bodies, the poles, and railings of the subway car. It was mesmerizing to watch. Their bodies seemed to move like liquid, wrapping around poles and contorting in unbelievable ways. They were young and energetic, but it wasn’t youth or energy that captivated me. It was the flexibility, strength, and movement of the human body. Engineered to perfection, we often don’t realize how powerfully well-built our bodies are. We tend to take for granted the resiliency and energy that we possess until something goes wrong.

When our lives were upended last year by the pandemic, I walked and danced to help cope with the stress of being restricted, working from home, and everyday life. Thanks to the internet, I had lunchtime dance classes with Debbie Allen on Wednesday afternoons and danced to the sounds of DJ DNice at Club Quarantine well into many nights. It was refreshing to move in ways that I hadn’t in years (and in the privacy of my own space). As the uncertainty of the pandemic raged on, I began walking more and more. I was frustrated and, to be honest, a little scared of the unknown invader that had changed my life in such a dramatic way. Soon, I was walking 4-6 miles a day. A few months later, I developed an injury.  

There’s nothing like having something taken away from you to make you see it with different eyes. We tend to appreciate or want what we can’t or don’t have. Sidelined by injury, all I wanted to do was go outside and walk. It was a simple thing that I liked doing but hadn’t given much thought about being able to do it. The recovery period was slow and frustrating because, like a screaming toddler, I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. But during that period, I began to understand even more the importance of good health, a strong body, and a resilient spirit. The connection exists in ways that we don’t often consider but experience with every breath we take.

Our bodies are not simply flesh and bone but interdependent and interrelated systems required for the whole body to function correctly. You’ve undoubtedly heard some of the words to ‘Dem Bones,’ a 1920’s gospel song that has been used in part to teach children about how their bones are connected (written by James Weldon Johnson and his brother). Some of the lyrics are: “The leg bone’s connected to the knee bone. The knee bone’s connected to the thigh bone.” The song is accurate and can lead us to a better understanding of the interconnection of the body’s systems and functions. When one thing is off, it affects another. Sometimes many others.

This is your reminder to remember that your body is a magnificently built and incredibly well-oiled machine. When you take care of it, you won’t have to worry about its performance.